After all this discussion of
the problem, we believe we have a solution. We call for all men and women who
have read our argument to begin combating casual homophobia and misogyny on a
daily basis. It will be difficult. Once you have become aware of the problem,
you will see it everywhere. Even from your closest friends.
You will need to address
them. But the key is to be non-confrontational. For many of us, we don’t even
realize how much this problem has pervaded our vocabulary and speech. Even more
of us would deny holding sexist or homophobic views. But pose this question to
them: do you believe subconscious cues impact your decision-making processes?
We have found that many people would say yes.
The next logical leap in
that conversation is how loaded language can be. When someone equates being a
woman to being weak, or being gay to being un-cool, it becomes a form of ranked
and coded language. We are all quietly assaulting the validity of one’s
identity when we use this language. Ask your friends to think pensively about
the words that come out of their mouth. Don’t reprimand them. But posit the
idea that sticks and stones may break bones, but words can last forever.
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